Monday June 27 2011 (Written May 2012, Posted Dec 2013)
Went on my first date in a long, long time. It was very oddly, very much like a first, first date.
Abysmal failures trying to find a girl I could go out with were becoming the norm for me. This was beginning to look the same. We had met on Friday at 37th And Zen where The Pushers were doing a sketch comedy show. She had conveniently sat down next to me with her sister before the show started. After the show and a few drinks and with no small part from my wingman, Nick, I had her number and we began texting.
Plans to go out Sunday after dinner fell apart for unfathomable reasons that seemed part of the reasoning of most women I met. Bothered and bewildered, forget about bewitching. It looked like that was it, but after more time and communication we planned to go out Monday night. She was leaving Tuesday. Even though she lived a few thousand miles away and I had met her in Norfolk, she was staying in a neighborhood less than a mile from my house. At least when I rang at the door it wasn't her parents that answered, but aside from that I might as well have been in a rented tux ready to present a corsage. I don't normally like to bring up age. Maybe I should at least mention that we had both already celebrated and mourned our 40th.
She greeted me, and said in a quick way that showed the embarrassing humor of the situation, You have
to meet my mother.
What!!! An odd thing for a girl to say who hadn't many chances to come home since she had moved away more than twenty years ago.
We passed the typical American living room to have a quick view of a typical family room and mom, step-dad, sister, nephew, her young son and daughter and maybe others, a TV, an animal or two. Her mom came out to meet me. She was well into her sixties, but looked like a strong woman and fit. We spoke for a bit. I'm sure I was less loquacious than even your average pimply-faced teenager. I certainly didn't charm her, but apparently passed the not-an-axe-murderer test for now.
Back in the living room I sat with my date on the sofa for awhile looking at the photos on her phone—the photo albums of yore. At least her mom wasn't taking pictures of us. I met her son and daughter and heard about school, fishing, sports, and violin lessons. I was alone for a while left on the couch I had been making more uncomfortable than a couch should be by sitting too properly. I got up to check out some of the photos, paintings, furniture and knick-knacks. Was she getting a lecture?...or giving one! ...saying good night to the kids at least.
Who knows. We went out after I couldn't tell you how long. The prelude to a date was over and we were alone at last. Ah, where to go...
When we got back to her mom's place I walked her to the door. I figured the night had started so much like a high school date it should also end that way. I'm sure it must have been well past her curfew.
--Art
Wish I would have written this while the details were still fresh in my mind.
...I do still remember eyes, beautiful so close.
Technically my actual first date was in college with a girl named Diana. I say technically because it was a blind date so I can't really take credit for it. She was lovely and I was as socially uptight as could be.
From my sketchbooks done way back in the '90s.